3 Funny Stories
by Lavenian
Summary: AUthree basic, but funny, stories that will make you go LOL! or WTF? or even blank expression.


Disclaimer: Standard Disclaimer applies

A/N: these stories play a bit like a comic, so they may be a bit confusing

Story 1

Yoh in: Alley Tally

Lyserg is bowling his worst game against Hao here in the bowling alley today.

"Whoa! Hold it right there, Lyserg! From the way you're standing, you'll get a gutterball for sure" said Hao with a snide face.

"Shut up, Hao! There's nothing wrong with how I stand!" protested Lyserg as he prepared to throw his bowling ball.

"Okay, but don't say I didn't warn you" said Hao playfully.

Lyserg shoots, "Rats! A gutterball!" he muttered as his ball rolled to the side and into the gutter.

"Why do I always play my worst game whenever Hao is around?" said Lyserg to himself.

"That's because you let him talk you into a bad game" Lyserg looked up and saw Yoh lazily resting on the benches.

(A/N: what Yoh said is very important, so try to keep track)

"Oh, Yoh, what are you doing here?" asked Lyserg.

"Hao asked me to come so I can tell off how _cool_ he is to the crowd after they cheer for him in the tournament" replied Yoh.

"Figures, by the way, first prize for today's Junior League tournament is free bowling for the whole year" said Lyserg.

"Big deal" said Yoh, not really interested.

"…Plus, I heard it also comes with free beverages, and I know how much you like their quality orange soda" added Lyserg.

"Now THAT, is a big deal!" said Yoh excitedly.

Later…

Yoh got ready, for whenever his favorite orange soda was on the line, there was no holding back.

"What? You, my little brother and your pathetic 150 against my superior 230, get real, Yoh!" said Hao mockingly.

"I might get lucky!" said Yoh in defense.

"Whatever, but I'll be merciful on you and let you watch me, you might get a few pointers" said Hao.

After watching him throw the first ball, Yoh spoke up.

"You know, it's amazing Hao…"

"What is?" asked Hao.

"That you bowl as well as do it with a three step delivery. Go ahead, count your steps" said Yoh.

"One, Two…"

And Hao tossed, only, one pin was still standing.

"Darn! Left out the third pin! Dammit, I was so busy counting my steps I forgot where to aim the ball!" Hao cursed inwardly.

Later…

"You know what, Lyserg? I find it amazing that Hao can play so well… when you consider his grip" said Yoh.

This caught Hao's attention, "And what's wrong with my grip?" he asked.

"Look at how far apart the holes are, but… if you're not bothered by it, just forget it."

Hao felt his ball for a bit, "It does feel kinda funny" he thought.

He threw it, and…

"Rats! A gutterball!"

Later again…

Yoh bought himself a drink with a straw, as Hao got ready to throw.

"Y'know what, Lyserg? Hao has amazing powers of concentration. My slurping doesn't even seem to bother him… **SLLLUUURRRRPPPPPP!!!!!!**"

Hao's concentration broke…

"Another gutterball!?" he exclaimed.

"Don't feel too bad, it happens to the best of us, just keep trying" said Yoh reassuringly.

Later yet again…

"You know, it may not bother you, but I find it very annoying…" said Yoh.

"What!?" asked Hao, getting irritated at his own bad game.

"The overhead glare, light's too bright, I'm moving to another lane."

Hao looked up at the lights, "HOW THE HECK IS A GUY SUPPOSED TO BOWL IN THIS GLARE!?!?! NO WONDER MY GAME IS OFF!!!!"

Finally…

"Another GUTTERBALL!!!!" and Hao broke into sobs as he banged his head on the floor.

"And the winner is… Yoh Asakura with 150 points! Last place… Hao Asakura with 16!" said the announcer as he gave Yoh the trophy.

Yoh gave Lyserg the trophy, "I'm only in this for the beverages" said Yoh.

"Y'know, Yoh? I think I can beat Hao now!" exclaimed Lyserg.

"I don't think you'll get the chance, Lyserg…" said Yoh with a smile.

"Why not?" asked Lyserg.

Yoh pointed towards Hao who trashed all his bowling gear as well as his ball into the trash bin, muttering "…and then… all of a sudden… nothing but gutterballs… and my aim went bad, and… and… and the lights… and…"

"Looks like Hao has given up bowling" said Yoh as he chuckled towards the snack bar.

END

Story 2

Chocolove and Horohoro in: The Dating Game

Chocolove and Horohoro were in the park discussing about their money problems.

"Everyone has the same hang up, Horohoro, besides, I heard that money is very tight at the moment" said Chocolove reassuringly as he lounged on a bench.

But Horohoro wasn't at all reassured.

"At this point, Chocolove, my money is practically nonexistent! My allowance doesn't even get me past the weekend anymore…" said Horohoro as he leaned against a tree.

Then, hammering his fist into his hand, said determinedly "I just gotta increase my bread supply!"

"Speaking of which, how about we head over to Silva's diner for a handout?" said Chocolove, ignoring Horohoro's determination, but Horohoro spoke up…

"I think I have a scheme…" said Horohoro slyly, this made Chocolove jump, "EEEPPP!!!"

"Oh, come on Choco! Don't be chicken!" he said to his afro friend.

"When was the last time any one of your schemes worked?" said Choco worriedly, but then joined his friend for a walk towards the first phase of his new scheme.

"Okay, so maybe my schemes never work, but according to the Law of Averages, I should get at least one success by now!"

"It does?" said Choco.

"Okay, now, my scheme has to do with the Law of Supply and Demand."

"Another law? Man, you ought to run for congress" said Choco jokingly.

Later…

"Horo! This is a girl's school! It… it's full of… GIRLS!!!" shouted Choco as they arrived at their destination.

"…And girl's schools are always lacking in a supply of boys, now come on!"

With that, Horo and Choco called for all the girls to come to the auditorium to enact Horohoro's scheme.

"Okay girls, this is the deal… you just circle your picture in this yearbook and give one buck to my treasurer here…" he said motioning for Choco.

"…afterwards, I'll flash it to the Funbari basketball team, those guys are always looking for new fields to conquer."

"Groovy!" shouted the girls, and they lined up to Chocolove to pay.

Afterwards…

"What a messy operation…" remarked Choco.

"But look at the money, baby! Ol' Horo has a workable scheme at last!

Later…

"I kid you not, guys! Some of the most hottest and cutest girls you'll ever dream of are in this yearbook, plus, you can go to the school dance at their school in order to spend some quality time with them, just pay Choco here as you check the girl you want to go with, the ones who are encircled are the ones available…" said Horohoro.

"Hold it, let's take a look first…"

And sure enough…

"MAMA MIA!"

"VA-VA-VOOM!"

"COUNT ME IN!"

Later…

"Alright! Its official, the store is closed, the dance is on Saturday night next week, now behave yourselves!" said Horohoro as he and Chocolove departed.

"Anymore doubts Choco? There's no end to how far we can get with this one!" said Horohoro.

"I dunno, Horohoro, something doesn't feel right; you and success just… don't mix."

Next day…

"Man! All that money! I don't even know where to start spending it!" said Horohoro in a relaxed tone that appeared to belong to a man who knew his way around the world.

"I've been thinking about that, Horohoro, and I think that… maybe we should hold onto it until after the dance, just to play it safe" said Chocolove.

"Why? They got a good deal. What could possibly go wrong?" asked Horohoro.

"Yoohoo! Wait a minute!" and suddenly, they were surrounded by a cluster of girls, from the look on their uniform, they come from Funbari High.

"This may answer your question, Horohoro…" whispered Choco.

"Uh… who are you girls?" asked Horo.

"We're the girls from Funbari High who normally go on dates with the basketball team" they explained.

"Horo, I think you've done it again" said Chocolove.

"We heard you have a bureau for lonely private school girls…" they said, and Horo started to suspect something coming, but Choco was sweating like crazy.

"Tell me again about the Law of Averages, Horohoro!" he whispered.

"You made money? Fine! We like clever, ambitious boys, too!" the girls added.

"Y-you do?" said Horohoro.

"They're sharpening the axe!" whispered Chocolove as he shrank back with his back to Horohoro, with no way out.

"However, we don't have any dates for tonight…" said another one with an angry look and looked down at the ever shrinking duo.

"Here it comes…" said Chocolove as he "braced for impact."

"**GUESS WHICH TWO ENTERPRISING MONEY MAKERS ARE TAKING US OUT ON A GROUP DATE**!!!" shouted one.

"**ANY NUMBER OF GUESSES**!!" shouted another.

"**UP TO ONE**!!!!!"

Saturday night…

"More pizza waiter!"

"Make that two more!"

"More soda as well!"

And as for the duo, now clad in tuxedos and sulking at their mess, we come to them in their own discussion.

"Well, Horo, at least they solved the problem of where to spend it!"

"Shut up, Chocolove…"

END

Story 3

Manta in: It's all in your Mind

Manta was heading for his next class when Tamao called him.

"Manta! Hey, wait a minute!" she called out.

"Huh? Oh hey Tamao, what's up?" asked Manta.

"Faust called up, he says he wants to see you at his clinic after school" said Tamao.

"Why?"

"Something about a hypnosis experiment, he wants to try you out first."

"Hypnosis? Sure, it's better than having him chop my guts out!" said Manta, shuddering at the thought.

Later…

Faust was holding his pocket watch in front of Manta, trying to hypnotize him.

"You probably won't be able to hypnotize me, Faust, my willpower… is much… too… Zzzzz…" Manta fell asleep.

"Manta, can you hear me?" asked Faust, "I am going to take you back…" he said.

"Take me ba… zsjhds" Manta mumbled.

"You are in your class…" said Faust.

"uhhhh… teacher… didn't do homework… ha! Fell for that… lame excuse… about… homework stolen… luckily… he won't find out I was the one who put theovlsbbvf…" he traced off.

"Put the… WHAT? In Where?" asked Faust.

"Well, don't just lie there! Say something!" he asked again.

"Somethinionkfgrcmg…" Manta traced off again.

"sigh, okay Manta, I want you to go back in time six months" commanded Faust.

"Six months… walking along oak street… alien spacecraft… blue, green, puce, turquoise… lands in vacant lot… two spacemen took me inside and experimented on me…" then Manta had some sort of panic-struck convulsion "NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!"

"Spacemen! Chee!" Faust thought, then snapped his fingers to get Manta out of his convulsion.

"So… when are you gonna hypnotize me?" asked Manta.

"I already did, and you're a good test subject, we'll do more later… but first, let me transcribe the data here on this recorder to my computer first" said Faust as he walked out of the room.

"Mind if I watch some TV while you're transcribing?" asked Manta.

"Not at all, I'll be right back…" and closed the door.

"Yeehaa! This is a breakthrough in science! The name "Faust" will be a household word!" said Faust excitedly as he jumped and kicked his heels.

Then… after transcribing, "I'll fax this over to the university as soon as I'm done!" he said excitedly.

Afterwards…

"Okay Manta, let's resume…" but before he could, he saw something on the TV.

"We now return to: True Stories of the Strange and Unknown…

"_I was walking along oak street, when an alien spacecraft, blue, green, puce, turquoise, landed in a vacant lot."_

Faust was suddenly confused…

"_Two spacemen took me inside and experimented on me…_"

This was too familiar…

"_NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!NO!"_

"Hold it!" shouted Faust and Manta turned the TV off.

"Oak Street? Vacant lot? Aliens? Experiments? Where have I heard this all before?" said Faust.

"It sounds so familiar…" asked Faust.

"It should, it's a re-run, I saw it **six** months ago" said Manta as Faust fell back anime style.

END


End file.
